World Cup Half-Time Report

So, the Group Stages are now over. We know who has battled through to the knockout stages and who has bombed at the first hurdle. Here is my impression of all the teams and their performance so far.

Uruguay: I'll be honest and say I fancied them to get out of the group, but not as winners. Watching them against France, they were uninspiring, but then they came alive against the hosts, and again against the Mexicans. No doubt they'll be happy with their 2nd Round tie against the South Koreans, and have an eye on the Quarter Finals.

Mexico: Profited from an abject performance by the French this time out. Weren't particularly impressive in the opener against the hosts, and didn't exactly give the Uruguayans too much to worry about. But that's what you get with Mexico - dogged determination and write them off at your own peril. A repeat of their 2nd Round game against Argentina in 2006 awaits.

South Africa: A proud performance by the hosts in spite of their lack of world class talent. Gave the home support something to cheer about by not losing their opening game, but came undone against Uruguay. Also compounded the French misery in the last game, eventually going out on goal difference.

France: What can you say? In-fighting, divisions, sulking and more. A manager who lost all respect and dignity, players not performing to their ability, they only really showed glimpses of what they could do when it was too late. You wonder what incoming manager Laurent Blanc can do with them. I would suggest that quite a few of the squad have played their last international game, and have no one else to blame but themselves.

Argentina: Only good goalkeeping prevented them destroying Nigeria. In great form and with a front line to die for they're looking good bets to go far, and with Diego Maradona keeping us all entertained from the sidelines, they will strike fear into any team they face. Perhaps a little shaky in defence, but otherwise a force to be reckoned with. Unlikely to be troubled by 2nd Round opponents Mexico.

South Korea: I was impressed by the way they overcame the Greeks in the first game. They were out of their depth against Argentina, but that was to be expected. They were only a Yakubu miss away from going out, but they live to fight another day and take on Uruguay for a place in the Quarter-finals.

Greece: Seemed to think they'd done enough just to be there in the first place. No real intentions until they had the man advantage against Nigeria, otherwise they could quite easily have ended up losing all three games.

Nigeria: The so-called 'Super Eagles' flattered to deceive again. Only their goalkeeper prevented Argentina walking all over them. Then a unnecessary sending-off ended any real hope of making it out of the group. Could have beaten South Korea, but they wouldn't have really deserved it, would they?

USA: Caused England problems, without the help from Rob Green. Looked dead and buried against Slovenia, but dragged themselves back into it. Then a last gasp winner against Algeria to top the group, and avoid the Germans. Will fancy their chances against Ghana.

England: Where to start??!! But for a horrendous error by Green, they would have beaten the USA. Which would have papered over a poor, aimless performance. The debacle that was the Algerian game is possibly the worst ever England performance in a World Cup finals. Were better against Slovenia, but only because they knew they had to be. 'Rewarded' with a game against the old enemy Germany, it will be the true test of character and backbone the team need. They must ALL perform if they want to carry on in this tournament.

Slovenia: Ultimately unlucky not to progress, which they would have done but for America's late late show against the Algerians. Also benefitted from a keeper error in the first game, then looked in control before lettng the USA peg them back. Showed flashes of danger against the English, but it just wasn't enough in the end.

Algeria: Pretty poor showing. Didn't score a goal, and their only point was against the shambolic England. Hardly did the African continent proud.

Germany: After dismantling Australia, they had an abherration against Serbia. Podolski's missed penalty showed that they are human after all! Looked to be ekeing out a draw against Ghana until their best player, Ozil, scored a great goal. England will have to watch him closely.

Ghana: Not a bad showing considering their best player, Michael Essien, is missing. Could have shown a bit more adventure against Germany, but otherwise fairly solid, and the only African team not to fall at the group stage. Will feel they have a chance against the USA.

Australia: After their thrashing at the hands of Germany, they closed up and produced some respectable results. Only missed out on goal difference.

Serbia: After beating the Germans in their second game, they went into the showdown with Australia knowing they only needed to win and they would be through. They couldn't do it though, and the defeat left them bottom of the group, despite being seen as dark horses by some, me included.

Holland: Solid without being spectacular. The brand of 'Total Football' seems to be a thing of the past in my opinion. Admittedly they missed Robben, and the sooner he gets going, the better we'll all be.

Japan: Possibly their best ever performance at a World Cup. Some great players in the side, and against Denmark, I saw the two best free kicks of the tournament so far. An interesting game against Paraguay awaits in Round 2.

Denmark: I thought they would have enough to get through this group, but they showed hardly any real quality. A couple of errors by Sorensen in the Japan game undermined their chances.

Cameroon: Yet another African disappointment. Sadly the country are still in the shadow of what the 1990 squad achieved in Italy a full 20 years ago. Eto'o was played out of position against Japan, and unable to prevent defeats in the other two games.

Paraguay: Good against Italy, outclassed the Slovakians, and were in cruise control against New Zealand. Fully deserve their place in the next round and will certainly feel confident of a Quarter-final place. It won't be that easy though...

Slovakia: Nothing but steady. Thought they'd done enough to beat New Zealand, but fell asleep at the end. Poor against the Paraguayans, and then took advantage of the old and creaky Italians. A surprise name in the 2nd Round, but I don't anticipate them causing the Dutch any problems.

New Zealand: 3 games, 3 draws. Something to be proud of certainly. Only a dodgy penalty away from beating Italy.

Italy: Too old. Lacked any spark or creativity, and missed a goalscorer in the Inzaghi or Vieri mould. Admittedly the loss of Buffon was a huge blow, but it simply highlighted the dearth of talent in the Italian game at the moment.

Brazil: Laboured against the North Koreans, showed glimpses of what they can do against the Ivory Coast, before a stalemate with the Portuguese. But with the drudgery of the group over, they can open up and really dazzle us all. Regardless of Dunga's occasionally dour tactics, they have Robinho, Kaka, Luis Fabiano and Elano who can really play football.

Portugal: Seemed reluctant to show any real intent against the Ivory Coast, and bar a Ronaldo shot against the post were unspectacular. Then ran riot over the North Koreans to all but seal their 2nd Round place. A dull draw with the Brazilians to secure the runners-up spot, leaving a tasty 2nd Round tie against neighbours Spain. Ronaldo against David Villa. I will be watching this with interest. Hard to pick a winner.

Ivory Coast: Showed brief glimmers of what they can achieve, but still have to go down as an underachievement. Preparation was poor, with Sven not getting the squad together until only a few weeks beforehand and then Drogba's injury. With Didier Drogba probably playing his last World Cup, it's hard to see where a quality replacement will come from.

North Korea: No heroics to match those of 44 years ago. Did well against Brazil, but then seemed to think the hard work was done. Spectacularly undone by Portugal and less so by Ivory Coast. Still a triumph for the players.

Spain: Shock opening defeat to Switzerland, but then improved against Honduras (well, they ought to have done). Looked shaky to start with against Chile, but eventually showed some class to secure the group and avoid Brazil. Will have to be on top form to beat neighbours Portugal in a potential battle royale.

Chile: Quite a entertaining team really. Wins over Honduras and the Swiss had all but secured qualification, and started well against Spain, before loss of discipline cost them. An all-South American tie with Brazil awaits. Could get tasty with Chilean brawn taking on Brazilian samba skills.

Switzerland: Unremarkable despite beating Spain. Should really have had enough to sneak into the 2nd Round, but paid the price for not having any sort of creative spark in the team. Content to plod along.

Honduras: Nothing really to say about them, that's how little impact they had on this tournament. Ended the group stage matches with a dour and forgettable 0-0 draw.

Well, that's my summing up of the World Cup so far. I'll report back after each round is completed with comments and any talking points. Can England beat Germany? Who will survive the Spain/Portugal battle? Will the South Koreans get past Uruguay? If the results up to now are any guide, Christ knows!!!

Football Memories

Football isn't a matter of life and death. It's more important than that.

So said Bill Shankly all those years ago. Okay, so that's a bit of an exaggeration, but for me, football has been a major part of my life, giving me joy and grief in equal measures. Here, and in future blogs, I will pick out matches I've been to, or seen on the telly, or in extreme circumstances not bothered to watch at all!

This is very much an 'audience participation' blog, so I welcome, nay, DEMAND the input of my readers!
I have to remind you that these are MY memories, which may be inaccurate, or coloured by time, so if you have different memories, or feel the need to correct ant historical inaccuracies, I give you the POWER!!

Oh, and before I forget, these are not going to be in chronological order!!

First in the series is the Shrewsbury vs Everton game in the 3rd round of the FA Cup. If my memory serves me correctly, it was January 2004. I'd already queued up for my ticket at some ridiculous time of the morning and been one of the lucky ones. So now, fresh from a domestic argument with my now ex-wife, I attended this game with an air of hope (for the game) and relief (at getting away from home). The Everton side included a certain Mr Rooney. The Shrewsbury side contained a certain Mr Wilding. Mr Rooney spent pretty much the entire game in Pete Wildings pocket. I certainly don't recall any incidents where Rooney caused the Town any problems.

It was bloody cold, and I was stood in the Riverside, snugly wrapped up in scarf, warm coat and gloves. Cigarette and Cigar smoke mixed with stale aftershave and pies and beer.
The first half was marked by the shouts of "get into them, fuck 'em off!" and a positively superb free kick goal by Nigel Jemson. (I can't remember if this was pre- or post-argument with the fan).

Half time came, and I munched on a sausage roll, drank my coke and read my matchday programme. The Golden Gamble draw was done (I never did it myself, but it was like an institution). Then the second half started and things went a bit awry. Everton equalised through Alexandersson and then Everton looked a bit happier about the whole thing. Time ticked away without much to talk about, until the last few minutes. Town got a corner (or was it another free kick?) down by the clock (where Riverside and Wakeman End meet). Ian Woan took it, and Jemson got his head on it, sending the ball into the net, and about 6,000 Shrewsbury fans, me included, mental!!

I can't remember how much more of the game was left, but a remarkable 2-1 win was ours! Good coverage on Match of the Day (or was it the ITV equivalent?) followed, as did a 4th round tie against Chelsea. Led by Zola, they won 4-0 in front of the TV Cameras (thinking about it, I'm pretty sure it was BBC). Town went on to end the season as the strongest team in the Football League (ie holding the others up) and their 50 year stint in the league was over. Kevin Ratcliffe left the moment relegation was confirmed and took alot of well-earned stick.

Now, readers (if there's anyone out there?), it's your turn...

Controversy Time!!

We all know the World Cup is not far away now. Just three months from now, we'll all have our head in our hands as England go out of the tournament either on penalties, because of an individual error for which the culprit will be hounded, or both!

In the meantime, there will be the endless debates about who should be in the squad and who should book themselves a holiday to the Bahamas or something. Here, then, is MY suggestion for the final 23.

Goalkeepers
Paul Robinson
David James
Joe Hart

Defenders
John Terry
Rio Ferdinand
Matthew Upson
Glen Johnson
Leighton Baines
Wes Brown
Ashley Cole (if fit) / Stephen Warnock

Midfielders
Steven Gerrard
Gareth Barry
Fat Frank Lampard
James Milner
Shaun Wright-Phillips
Aaron Lennon
Theo Walcott
Michael Carrick

Forwards
Peter Crouch
Wayne Rooney
Jermain Defoe
Gabby Agbonlahor
Darren Bent

This is purely my opinion, based on my own knowledge of English players at this moment. No doubt there are cases for those I've left out, and I'm happy to encourage lively debate!!

Here's to a World Cup semi-final defeat on penalties!!!

Why are we waiting??

My second child is due on the 8th March, but why do I have to wait so long? Because nature, and my newest offspring is laughing at me!!

Lateness seems to run in the genes (much like diarrohea) in my family. Both myself and my brother were late, as was my son. He was originally due to share my birthday, but held on another two weeks to ensure no sharing of birthday (true proof that he is my son lol).

Not more than three days ago, we were facing the prospect of an induced labour due to a 'slightly higher than normal' glucose test. In a strange way, despite my girlfriend having nightmares about it, I didn't mind - it meant the arrival was sooner rather than later! But now, after a perfectly normal reading (much to the joy and satisfaction of Marisa) we are back to waiting for nature to take effect.

So, now all the wisdom and wives tales are being trotted out... pineapple, steady movement, curry and sex, none of which really bother me, I happen to like pineapple. Marisa heard a new one the other day - Castor Oil (??!) Suffice to say, we won't be trying that one in a hurry.

I remember a Michael McIntyre routine from a few years back (remember him? I wonder what happened to him?) where his pregnant wife was searching for things to bring on labour. She happened on advice to 'ingest sperm'. Michael got excited about this - a blowjob for her own good, every man's dream - but she suggested he just wank into a cup!!!

So, anyway, hopefully the next blog will be a celebratory one, with little Anthony or Helena somewhere in the background keeping everyone busy. Fingers bloody crossed!

Or at least I will have had an exhausting weekend... know what I mean? wink wink, nudge nudge... say no more...

A Good Moan

It must be down to me approaching 30, but I'm just finding loads of stuff to moan about. At the moment, I'm digesting the following:

1 - Why is it that Football Clubs are treated different to normal businesses? If a run-of-the-mill company had debts of £70 million, they would be shut down in a flash. Not Portsmouth. No, they get chance after chance after chance. And while the current owner tries to make headway through the mire he has taken over (purely because the previous owner defaulted on a loan), what of the previous management that actually plunged the club into such a mountain of shit? Probably sunning themselves on a beach somewhere. Bastards!
And it's not just Portsmouth. The list of clubs with huge debts is almost never-ending: Red Scum United, Liverpool, Crystal Palace, Bournemouth spring immediately to mind. Then there's the Notts County situation, the Chester problem, and the Glasgow Rangers conundrum. They all have money troubles, all down to over-extending themselves.
Then there's Peter Risdale. He virtually ruined Leeds, now Cardiff are struggling for money. He should have been banned from football for the abject misery he brought to Leeds United. Let's be honest, that's what happens in the real world.

2 - The Iphone. It's a rip off really. What do you need all those applications for? Really? It's an Ipod with internet that coincidentally allows you to make the odd phone call. Don't see the point.

3 - The bizarre music phenomenon that calls itself 'RnB'. This is bollocks. It bears no resemblance to the actual origination of R and B - for all you young un's thats Rhythm And Blues. I suppose it's like BP - it no longer means British Petroleum, it's just two letters.

That's enough for now... the ironing calls. That's right, I do my own ironing.