Sunday, 30 December 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 31.12.2012

And so, here we are. The final Monday Mix-tape of 2012. It's been quite a year in general, what with that sporting event in London, a non-existent Apocalypse, crazy American gun nutters, continuing unrest in the Arab nations and other stuff.

To go alongside all that, I have tried to guide you all through a musical minefield of what you should be listening to using themes ranging from TV theme songs to stuff I listened to on holiday in Austria. Hopefully you've taken some of it on board and your music collection is suitably enriched.

For this last edition of 2012, I'm going to look forward to 2013. I am featuring two artists who will hopefully be releasing a full album of material into the world, one who I've been enjoying for a while, and one I discovered as recently as the 22nd December this year. I shall leave it to you to work out which is which...

1) Jesus Won't Dance In My High Heels - Four Dead In Ohio
It's got a guitar riff to die for!

2) Utah - Four Dead In Ohio
A real slow burner!

3) Debbie's Whiskey Bar - Four Dead In Ohio
From their most recent EP release!

4) UFO - Four Dead In Ohio
No aliens, promise!

5) Peasants Prayer - Four Dead In Ohio
No mention of food or running water, or anything like that!

6) Emma - The Hummingbirds
Best use of a whistling for a long time!

7) Back In Liverpool - The Hummingbirds
Why would you want to leave?!

8) Break Your Heart - The Hummingbirds
Title track from latest EP!

9) Bankrupt Blues - The Hummingbirds
Bills need to be paid!

10) You - The Hummingbirds
Just go and buy the EPs!


Two different bands, two different sounds, but two bands well worth a listen folks!

Happy New Year from Specs, Rugs And Sausage Rolls!!!

Sunday, 23 December 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 24.12.2012

So, well, bloody hell. It's really Christmas. After all that anticipation and hassle over what to ask Santa Claus to bring you (wink, wink), in two sleeps time, he'll have been and left you a pile of gifts under your tree, drunk your brandy and eaten your mince pie. And left you with the difficult question to answer: "How did Santa come down the chimney when we've got a Gas fire, Mummy/Daddy?"

So, while you try and come up with ways to get out of that one, here's my Mix-tape list of ten festive tracks that simply have to be played at this time of year...

1) Merry Xmas Everybody - Slade
It's Chriiiiiiiiistmaaaaaaass!

2) I Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day - Wizzard
Highly impractical!!

3) Christmas Time (Don't Let The Bells End) - The Darkness
The best festive tune of recent times!

4) Wonderful Christmastime - Paul McCartney
A cheery old singalong - as all festive tunes ought to be!

5) Happy Christmas (War Is Over) - John & Yoko
Combining a message of peace with Christmas!

6) Power Of Love - Frankie Goes To Hollywood
Not particularly a Christmas song!

7) Lonely This Christmas - Mud
More Seventies Christmas schmalz!

8) Must Be Santa - Bob Dylan
An unlikely source for a Christmas tune!

9) Little Drummer Boy - Bing Crosby & David Bowie
Ba-rum-pum-pum-pum!

10) Blue Christmas - Elvis Presley
The King does Christmas!

Friday, 21 December 2012

A Short Message From Specs, Rugs And Sausage Rolls

So, on the day the world DIDN'T end, and a second American nutter with a gun took innocent lives exactly one week after the Newtown events, I would just like to say:

Americans, you are being let down by a minority of knobheads.

The National Rifle Association seem to me to be nothing more than a bunch of people too stupid to understand one simple fact of life - GUNS KILL. They have no other purpose than to end the life of whatever they are pointed at, be it bears, birds, or sadly, humans.

Do you really need to own a gun?! Really? I understand that there is a need to defend yourself, but hey, here's a thought for Barack and his buddies. If you stop people having a constitutional right to own a gun, then surely fewer people will have one. And to solve the problem of all those existing gun-owners, just hold a gun amnesty where for every five guns handed in, you get a free Big Mac Meal or something, you know, just to encourage them.

There were statistics banded about showing the number of gun-related deaths, and naturally, the US were miles ahead of places like the UK, Australia and France. I'd imagine things would look a little different if Mexico and Colombia were included, but that's not the point here!

I'm a parent of young children, and there are millions of parents of young children in the US and all over the world. And I would think we all have one thing in common: none of us ever want to be told our young ones have been murdered by a lunatic wielding a gun whilst at school. Nor do we want to have to comfort them having seen many of their friends and teachers murdered by the same lunatic.

So. Get. Rid. Of. The. Guns.

Merry Christmas to you all.

Sunday, 16 December 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 17.12.2012

Yes, I'm back again. This is the last Monday Mix-tape before the mayhem of Christmas really begins. Unless you're one of those who leaves your shopping until the last minute, I'd expect you've done it all, wrapped it up and found a suitable hiding place somewhere in the house (but be warned: they will be looking at every opportunity!)

So, in this lull, I'm going to give you ten tracks to relax with. You can just sit and listen with a relaxing coffee, or glass of wine and a mince pie. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin...

1) Small World - Roddy Frame
One man and his guitar!

2) Calico Skies - Paul McCartney
An ex-Beatle and a guitar!

3) Tangerine - Led Zeppelin
Four men but no fruit!

4) Crystal - Mando Diao
Some Swedish men yet no cut glass in sight!

5) Drop In The Sea - Kula Shaker
Nineties band without a drop of water for miles!

6) Easy Like Sunday Morning - The Commodores
Simples!

7) How Does It Feel - Slade
Four hairy blokes from the Black Country!

8) I Got The Blues - The Rolling Stones
Don't feel too sad though!

9) Karma Police - Radiohead
Don't panic, not the real police!

10) Oliver James - Fleet Foxes
One man's voice!

And also, just as a tribute to the legendary Ravi Shankar, here's three pieces of his music to listen to and let all your troubles and tension drift away on the music...

a) Raga Ahir Bhairav
b) Dadra
c) Maru-Bihag

So that's all for now... the next edition will be a most festive offering for you to enjoy!!!

Sunday, 9 December 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 10.12.2012

You'd think that after seven months, I'd start to run out of ideas for these little things, wouldn't you? But thankfully things just keep cropping up to help me maintain a steady flow of mix-tape helpings.

And this week is no different - my poor girlfriend is currently laid up with a bad case of Sciatica and so, this week, in her honour, it's songs with the word 'back' in the title!

1) I Want You Back - The Jackson 5

2) I'll Be Back - The Beatles

3) Coming Back Hard Again - The Fat Boys

4) Back In The USSR - The Beatles

5) The Boys Are Back In Town - Thin Lizzy

6) Back To Life - Soul II Soul

7) Baby Got Back - Sir Mix-a-lot

8) Back Against The Wall - Cage The Elephant

9) Sing It Back - Moloko

10) Don't Look Back In Anger - Oasis

And with that, I say "Get Well Soon" Marisa!!

Saturday, 8 December 2012

Albums You Should Own - John Lennon Special

It's been a while since I last visited this series, and today I said to myself, 'it's time to do another one'.

For those who don't know (either through ignorance or a lack of interest in anything historical), today, the 8th December marks 32 years since the murder of John Lennon, possibly the 20th Century's most influential and most loved musician/peacenik/artist/writer.

So, to mark this occasion, instead of a Monday Mix-tape (which I already did to mark what would have been his 72nd birthday), I thought I'd have a look at his solo career and try and guide you to the gems, and steer you away from the duds (even as a devoted Lennonite, I can see that he has had some bad days).

So, to start off, when John and the Beatles went their seperate ways after the recording of Abbey Road, whilst the court case to dissolve the business partnership rumbled on, John did his thing with Yoko, did a bit of Primal Therapy with Mr Janov and brought out the Plastic Ono Band album. It's hard to find a weak link on this album, to be honest. From the opening funereal bells of 'Mother' the bar is set high (no change there) and it is only surpassed, in my view, by 'Working Class Hero' and 'God'. But that's not to say that the delicateness of 'Love' or 'Isolation' do not merit praise. I heartily implore you to go out and get this record!

After that, came the album that may have ensured his place amongst the greatest musicians of the modern era, Imagine. Everyone knows the title track and how good it is, so for me to preach a sermon is unneccessary. The album itself contains some real crackers, 'Crippled Inside', 'Jealous Guy', 'Gimme Some Truth', 'Oh My Love' and so on and so on. To sum up, I have three words for you on Imagine: BUY THIS ALBUM.

On the completion of Imagine, John decided to up-sticks and move to the US. And then, in 1972, he brought us his highly politicised (comparitively speaking) Some Time In New York City. I do have this album, somewhere, but sadly it doesn't really strike a chord with me and it's only really for the complete devotee fan. It does contain the track 'Woman Is The Nigger Of The World', which is well worth a listen.

He returned to more palatable output the next year, with his Mind Games album. There are some great tracks on this album, aside from the title track, 'Tight A$' is a fast paced little rocker, 'Bring On The Lucie (Freda Peeple)' may have a ridiculous title, but it's a nice little sing-a-long once you know the words! This is followed by the silence of the 'Nutopian International Anthem' before heading on to the second side (remember when you had to get up and turn a record over? Something today's kids have no appreciation for). 'Out The Blue' is a sweet little song, and it's one I find has resonance in my life, and no doubt others will feel the same. It's worth investigating.

John's 'Lost Weekend' phase is quite well documented for all the drunken goings-on, but let's not forget he still managed to give us Mind Games and his next offering, Walls And Bridges. The lead single, 'Whatever Gets You Thru The Night'  is bold, brassy and instantly loveable. You've also got songs like 'What You Got', '#9 Dream', and 'Nobody Loves You (When You're Down And Out)' to keep you going, and the album finishes with a throwaway version of 'Ya Ya' which not only got him into a heap of legal trouble, but also inspired his next record. You should give it a try, you might just like it.

Which was the covers album, Rock And Roll. Songs that he liked as a boy, or that he enjoyed performing, or just took his fancy. Like Gene Vincent's 'Be Bop-A-Lula', or my favourite, his version of Ben E King's 'Stand By Me'. This album is a nice way to see what inspired Lennon himself to pick up a guitar, whilst also hearing John's own take on the songs. I've bought it, and I think you should consider it too!

It was at this point that John Lennon's life changed. Yoko finally gave birth to the child they'd been trying for for years, Sean Lennon was born on John's 35th birthday, and John hung up his guitar and decided that he would take responsibility for Sean's immediate upbringing. So, five years later, and John felt the time was right to hit the studio once more, thus giving us the joint effort with Yoko, Double Fantasy. Now, I'm not going to lie and say I can listen to this album all day, because to be honest, Yoko's tracks don't really do it for me. But when you realise that John's offerings include '(Just Like) Starting Over', 'I'm Losing You', 'Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy)', 'Watching The Wheels' and 'Woman', there is only one decision to make: Buy the CD, or download an mp3 version.

This however, is where John's living input ended. His death brought to a sudden halt the burst of creativity John was enjoying, with enough rough cuts in the can for another album, and in 1984, four years after he was taken from the world, the release of Milk And Honey gave everyone the chance to hear John's last songs. The stand out tracks for me are 'I Don't Wanna Face It', 'Nobody Told Me', 'Borrowed Time', and the poignant and quite gutwrenching 'Grow Old With Me'. Another one for the completists.

Or, you can say to yourself, 'I can't be arsed spending all that money buying albums for songs I might not like'. In which case, the compilation Lennon Legend is for you! All the hits, along with singles such as 'Cold Turkey', the festive 'Happy Xmas (War Is Over)', 'Give Peace A Chance', and 'Instant Karma!' (the exclamation mark is part of the title, I assure you!)

Well, I can say no more. Other than War Is Over. If you want it.

Sunday, 2 December 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 03.12.2012

So, welcome to December! By now, there are already two doors open on your advent calendar (I bet you've got one with chocolate in haven't you? Course you have). Anyhow, this week, I'd completely forgotten about my weekly mix-tape offering until I was washing my son's hair this evening. I was at a total loss until my girlfriend suggested a theme. So here it is, this week's offering with the theme of... Family.

1) Mother - John Lennon
A little bit of Primal Therapy coming out!

2) Family Affair - Sly And The Family Stone
A Seventies Funk Family!

3) Father And Son - Cat Stevens
Not the ridiculous Boyzone version... Ughhhhh!

4) Brothers In Arms - Dire Straits
A song about brothers by a band with brothers in!

5) We Are Family - Sister Sledge
A Disco Family!

6) Uncle Sam - Madness
Lesser known track by UK Ska kings!

7) Mama Told Me (Not To Come) - Tom Jones
Mum knows best Tom!

8) Mama Weer All Crazee Now - Slade
I said 'mamamamamamamama yeah'!

9) Grandad - Clive Dunn
Everyone loves their Grandad!

10) He Ain't Heavy, He's My Brother - The Hollies
Hopefully soon to be top of the pops again for Hillsborough Families!

And that is that, ten songs about families and the like. Feel free to enjoy and return next week!! Hey, maybe you could submit your own suggestions, just like my girlfriend did this week!

Wednesday, 28 November 2012

My Writing Challenge for 2013 - Assistance Requested!

Yesterday evening I made a decision and announced it on my Specs, Rugs And Sausage Rolls Facebook page (head to http://www.facebook.com/specsrugssausagerolls and leave a comment or a 'like').

For the year 2013, I have decided to set myself the task or challenge of writing one 5,000 word short story every month. That's twelve stories and 60,000 words in the year.

There is no set theme, so the twelve stories could and probably will be twelve totally unrelated and individual.

And this is where I am inviting your input: some ideas or suggestions for settings, style, theme or whatever.

I've already had my first suggestion - a murder mystery set in a one bedroom flat!

So, you can either visit my facebook page, tweet me @specsnrugs, or leave a comment below. As many ideas as you like, and maybe you'll be lucky enough to have one chosen!

Many thanks for your time!

Sunday, 25 November 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 26.11.2012

As the year ebbs away before our eyes, and the Christmas rush begins in earnest, I thought I'd try and inject a bit of summery optimism by picking out ten tracks by an American group that arguably pushed and encouraged The Beatles to achieve and create what they did.

That's right, it's The Beach Boys!

1) Good Vibrations
Inspired by dogs. Apparently!

2) Wouldn't It Be Nice
Necessarily great opening track to Pet Sounds!

3) Surfin USA
Ironically, only one Beach Boy was a true surfer!

4) Heroes And Villains
Vocal layering to die for!

5) California Girls
Not to be confused with Katy Perry's differently spelt version!

6) I Get Around
Nothing to do with being promiscuous!

7) Little Deuce Coupe
One of many 'driving' songs!

8) I Know There's An Answer
But what is the question?!

9) Sloop John B
It's about boats and stuff!

10) In My Room
A real introspective track!

So now you can go and discover greatness, I've now got to go and find another theme for the next edition of Monday Mix-tape. It's hard work, you know!

Friday, 23 November 2012

The Live Fantastic

This past week, I've been listening to alot of music. Because I like music, believe it or not. I always have had some interest whether it was Living In A Box or Vanilla Ice in my early formative years, Oasis or Radiohead in my teenage years, The Beatles or Sinatra in my twenties, to the present day where you'll often find me listening to pretty much anything of genuine quality (ie non TV Talent Show derived nonsense).

In particular, to mark the delivery of the latest Led Zeppelin live CD/DVD 'Celebration Day' to this rather Led Zeppelin crazed household, I've been listening to the greatest band of the Seventies, and certainly challenging The Beatles for the 'Greatest Band Of All Time' crown, er, well it's Led Zeppelin of course!

As a studio band they were pretty awesome, as their albums testify (the later ones are a bit thin in quality compared to the likes of their early numbered albums and Physical Graffiti), but as a live performing band, from watching the DVD footage and listening to the live recordings, they took it to a whole new level of awesomeness.

Which then got me on to other live albums that I have in my collection, and whether they capture the respective artists quality and performance as successfully.

1) Double Life - Nick Harper
Slightly off-beat guitar magician, this album captures his live persona perfectly, from his energetic playing to his inter-song banter.

2) Familiar To Millions - Oasis
Recorded during the tour of probably their worst album, Standing On The Shoulder Of Giants, at a time when Liam Gallagher was at his most arrogant and obnoxious. A pity really as I have experienced them myself, and they were better than this.

3) Live At Earls Court - Morrissey
A mixture of his solo output and some Smiths songs in there too, this is one of my favourite live albums in my collection. Even better, there's none of his aloofness coming through either.

4) Good Evening New York City - Paul McCartney
Recording of the concert marking the opening of the rebuilt Shea Stadium, now branded as CitiField or something similar. Whilst it is certainly a reflection of his Macca-ness in action, having seen him in the flesh, the CD is sadly unable to produce the same hair-stood-up-on-the-neck feeling.

5) How The West Was Won - Led Zeppelin
And we come full circle. Led Zeppelin as captured over a couple of shows in their prime. Best listened to at a deafening volume.

6) Live At Leeds - The Who
From their Leeds University gig in 1970, this was the first Who album I bought. This was only the initial release, there have been another two since, finally incorporating the entire Tommy section of the gig, and you can hear a band still at their pinnacle bounding through their repertoire with energy and excitement.

So, that's the conclusion of my live album discussion. If there's ever a good Rolling Stones live album, or even The Beatles (assuming they can try and eradicate the screams), rest assured I shall be adding them to my collection.

Sunday, 18 November 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 19.11.2012

Hello, again, folks! We've passed the half-way point of November now, and the C-word is now just 37 days away. For a change, I've pretty much completed my C-word shopping, so it will be a relaxed time in the Moore-Kober household - apart from the crafting frenzy currently in action next to me as I type!

This week's ten tracks have been inspired by an uneducated remark made by that Irish-Westlife-twonk in this year's edition of Strictly Come Dancing (I'm not a fan, but we put it on around bedtime so that Anthony sees that there is nothing worth staying awake for!) where he announced the song he was going to be dancing to was 'The Best Is Yet To Come' by Michael Buble. Now, the uneducated amongst us will probably not see that as particularly inaccurate, but as I'm educated, it got my back up good and proper! Firstly, there have been countless versions of that song long before Buble was able to talk, let alone hold a note, and secondly, he's not very good in my opinion.

Which got me thinking, so here are ten tracks by ten artists who have more talent in their socks than Buble will ever dream of having, and some of them are dead! In fact, I would anticipate that if you were to exhume Frank Sinatra's body, he would still put on a better show!!

1) The Best Is Yet To Come - Frank Sinatra
Although not in this list!

2) Volare - Dean Martin
Frank's Rat Pack buddy!

3) Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Andy Williams
Who's been playing with the glue?!

4) Rags To Riches - Tony Bennett
The ultimate Lottery win!

5) Beyond The Sea - Bobby Darin
Another quality crooner!

6) The Candy Man - Sammy Davis Jr
Sweet entry from the third Rat Packer!

7) Unforgettable - Nat King Cole
One of the few I could remember!

8) Release Me - Engelbert Humperdinck
It kept the Beatles off Number One!

9) Catch A Falling Star - Perry Como
Watch out for sharp corners!

10) Always On My Mind - Mike Reid
Yes, I'm saying Frank Butcher is better than Buble!


And that concludes my Better-than-Buble Mix-tape selection. I think you'll find it hard to argue that he is superior to ANY of the above artists, which means my job is done.

Until next time, amigos!

Sunday, 11 November 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 12.11.2012

So, another week has been and now gone. And as this weekend included Remembrance Day (not as the frighteningly overused Twitter trend called it #rememberancesunday), this week is a Mix-tape with a difference.

Instead of ten tracks to listen to over the next week, today, I'm going to give you ten War poems by different poets for you to discover. Now I'll be honest and say I've not read much poetry since leaving school, so in order to compile this list, I've had to read and discover a lot of poetry, and the source which was so valuable to me was a website called www.poemhunter.com - try it, as a bank of poetry, it's quite handy.

Anyway, here is my list of poems for you to find and take in...

1) Aftermath - Siegfried Sassoon

2) Anthem For Doomed Youth - Wilfred Owen

3) In Flanders Field - John McCrae

4) All Day It Has Rained - Alun Lewis

5) Agony - Mark R Slaughter

6) 1914 V: The Soldier - Rupert Brooke

7) Vergissmeinnicht - Keith Douglas

8) As The Team's Head-Brass - Edward Thomas

9) Break Of Day In The Trenches - Isaac Rosenberg

10) The Conscientious Objector - Karl Shapiro

There you are, then. Go forth and be educated (or re-educated if you know this stuff already!)

Until next time...

Sunday, 4 November 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 05.11.2012

Hello again, my lovely readers! Good God, I sound like an Agony Aunt! Anyway, another week has passed, and another week closer to Christmas. Following from last week's theme, this week I'm going to focus on Wales. The country, not the marine mammal...

1) Delilah - Tom Jones
Why, why, why?!

2) The Bartender And The Thief - Stereophonics
I can just about bear this one!

3) Motorcycle Emptiness - Manic Street Preachers
An absolute Classic!

4) Mulder And Scully - Catatonia
A bit of name-checking!

5) Demons - Super Furry Animals
Best Band name ever?!

6) Monster - The Automatic
What is coming over the hill?!

7) Big Spender - Shirley Bassey
Not a song about me, that's for sure!

8) (If Paradise Is) Half As Nice - Amen Corner
Not one for the deeper voiced amongst us!

9) Watsville Blues - Manic Street Preachers
They get another one because they are the best Welsh band ever. Fact!

10) Baby It's Cold Outside - Tom Jones and Cerys Matthews
A bit of seasonal Welsh dueting!

Go forth and enjoy some Welshness!!

Wednesday, 31 October 2012

3 Years of Blogging - Anniversary Q&A

Some time ago (about a week), I put out an open invitation for you lovely readers to submit questions, to be answered by me, here. Unfortunately, the interest was poor to non-existent (you miserable buggers). Anyway, here are the few questions I did get, with some answers.

What is the correct way to eat a gingerbread man? With a knife and fork.
Do elves really wear those shoes with the curling tips? They do, their Winklepickers are creased.
Why is abbreviation such a long word? Because abbrev. looks silly.
If you wear a sheet for halloween are you a ghost or a mattress? Neither, you're a knob.
What is the speed of dark? The time it takes to punch someone's light out.
Can I throw a pie in justins face? Yes.
Does a jellybaby feel any pain? Not if you give it jellyparacetomol.
What colour are your underpants? Today, they're black.
Is the moon made out of cheese? Yes, it's moon cheese.
Does iggle piggle have nightmares? Yes, about Upsy Daisy having an orgy with the Pontipines and the Wattingers... the dirty whore.
Can I have some cheese on toast? Only if you make me some.
What's the sound of one hand clapping? It depends if there is anyone around to hear it.
What's that smell? Well, it isn't success...
Hello, is it me you're looking for? Sorry, wrong number.

So, thanks to the, ahem, THREE of you that actually joined in, and remind me never to bother trying this again. Ever.

Sunday, 28 October 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 29.10.2012

Hello folks! Back again, or discovering for a first time? Well, lucky you, whichever it is. With the current hulabaloo over Scottish Independence, I've gone for a Scottish theme...

1) Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand
Probably their high-point, to be fair!

2) U16 Girls - Travis
One for Savile and Glitter!

3) It's My Own Cheating Heart That Makes Me Cry - Glasvegas
It's what I think my ex-wife ought to be singing!

4) Bye Bye Baby - Bay City Rollers
Get your scarves out girls!

5) A Girl Like You - Edwyn Collins
One I remember from Atlantic 252!

6) Mellow Yellow - Donovan
Nothing to do with custard!

7) Whistle For The Choir - The Fratellis
Purse your lips and whistle!

8) Why - Annie Lennox
If she don't know, how can we?!

9) 500 Miles - The Proclaimers
And 500 more!

10) Loaded - Primal Scream
I want to get loaded, and have a good time!

So, settle in with your Whiskey, your Bag pipes and your tam-o-shanter, and become an adopted Scot!

Sunday, 21 October 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 22.10.2012

Hello, only me again! Sorry, but it's that time again... Mix-tape Time!! I couldn't come up with a theme myself, and despite my invitation to you readers to come up with a theme from time to time, no one has bothered. So I picked up my phone, went to the music player and shoved it on random, and what follows is the first ten tracks...

1) How Do You Sleep? - John Lennon
John has a post-break-up dig at Paul!

2) Act Naturally - The Beatles
Ringo basically admits he can't act!

3) At My Most Beautiful - REM
Cor, I'm gorgeous!

4) Red Scab - Adam & The Ants
Punk scabbiness!

5) I Was Made To Love Her - Stevie Wonder
Stevie knows why he's here!

6) My Little Empire - Manic Street Preachers
Manics come over a little 'Napoleon'!

7) She's Crafty - The Beastie Boys
Either she's sneaky, or good with her hands!

8) Sunrise - Norah Jones
Ravi Shankar's daughter, did you know?!

9) I Feel Free - Cream
No restrictions!

10) Can't Truss It - Public Enemy
Totally un-truss-able!

There you go, a mix-tape selection that's totally random. Until next time!

Saturday, 20 October 2012

Countryside Matters

I'm not one to deliberately court controversy, as you know, so I've put alot of thought into this post, fully aware of the emotive nature of the subject matter.

As I'm sure you're aware, the Government have sanctioned a test cull of badgers in the south of the country, the exact areas shrouded in secrecy to protect those involved from animal rights activists, who can be quite militant in their methods - remember the ones who stole the remains of a deceased relative of a family connected to the Huntingon Life Sciences laboratory?

The purpose is to try and prevent the ever increasing impact of Bovine Tuberculosis on our Cattle population. At a time when the numbers of cattle being slaughtered is reaching unprecedented levels, it's widely agreed that action is required. It is the method which is causing the upset. Innoculation of the Cattle population has been suggested, but this won't solve the problem. It has also been suggested that we attempt to innoculate the badger population - this has been deemed too expensive and too difficult (both the trapping, and ensuring against repeat innoculation, not to mention that this won't protect against those already infected). So, this leaves the final option, and the one the Government have approved - the cull.

In my capacity as an employee of a prominent Insurance company, this matter is currently the subject of advice and recommendations to protect our safety, being potentially in the firing line from the animal rights activists (although no cull is currently planned in this area).

Let's just think about this for a moment.

There are some things that need to be considered. Firstly, Cattle play an immense role in the human food chain - we get meat, milk (and consequently butter, yoghurts etc) from cows. Unless some action is taken, the cattle numbers in this country will not be able to provide what we need. What's the alternative? Badgers? Have you tried to milk a badger??!!
Do you fancy a Badger steak with your chips?! No?!
Also, Badgers aren't really the cuddly little creature you read about in Wind In The Willows, wearing slippers, and living in a tree trunk. They can be nasty little blighters! Let's compare:

 
 
So, just to recap: difficult situation, action required, alternatives considered, controversial decision made. I can see both sides of the argument, but the over-riding message is that until a humane method can be found and proved viable, we have to do what's required to protect our cattle, and safeguard the future of the keepers of our countryside - the farmers whose livelihoods are so crucially in the balance.
 
It is also vital to say that this blog is entirely my own opinion and is in no way influenced, or representative of the views of my employer. And that's the truth.

Tuesday, 16 October 2012

A Little Quiz...

Because I'm bored, and I probably ought to be doing something with one of my many writing projects on the go, I've decided to have a little quiz with you all.

Name the ten sporting arenas below, and put your answers in the comments box:


German Football Stadium

NFL Stadium
English Cricket Ground
Brazilian Football Stadium
Scottish sporting Stadium
Spanish Football Stadium
US Stadium with Musical History
English Premier League Stadium
English sporting Arena
Aussie Cricket Ground
 
German multi-purpose Stadium

 
 




 
 

Sunday, 14 October 2012

Monday Mix-tape - 15.10.2012

Hello and welcome back to another Monday Mix-tape offering. This week saw a new single by the longest running Rock and Roll Group in the World. Ever. That's right. almost 50 years after their first release, The Rolling Stones are STILL going! Not something the likes of One Direction or Justin Twatface, sorry Bieber will manage before they return to their rightful places in the kitchens of McDonalds or KFC or whatever fast food joints deem fit to employ them.

But back to the real musicians in question. Yes, The Rolling Stones.

1) Gimme Shelter
Just A Shot Away!

2) Biggest Mistake
What you made by not visiting this blog before!

3) It's All Over Now
Ode to an ex!

4) Sister Morphine
Related to Brother Heroin!

5) Paint It Black
Monotone Stones!

6) She's A Rainbow
But there's no pot of gold at her feet!

7) Get Off Of My Cloud
Possessive over condensed water!

8) Sympathy For The Devil
He was pretty much everywhere!

9) Miss You
No one likes to miss someone!

10) Angie
Not a song about Miss Rippon, I fear!

So, there you have it. Here's to another couple of years at least!

Tuesday, 9 October 2012

Work In Progress - Feedback required!

Today would be John Lennon's 72nd birthday. A man who has left such an imprint on the world despite only walking upon it for only 40 years, something to rival the likes of Mozart and Beethoven!

Ok, while the Classical buffs are apoplectic with rage over those comparisons, I'll get on with the point of this post: John's death inspired me in a way to attempt a story based in the year 1980, the year of his death, and my birth. I tried to create a character that would have his own trials and tribulations yet eventually his life would intertwine with Lennon's in a similar style to Tony Parsons. My ultimate aim was to get my character in New York on the night of 8th December 1980 and draw parallels with Lennon. The plan I drew out would see my man in the same hospital at the same time, possibly involving a near death experience, only to resolve happily.

So, here is Chapter One of my project, currently entitled, simply, 1980...


Chapter 1
 
It had been a bad year in 1978. The next year was even worse for George Wilson. As the last few minutes ticked away into the history books, and the people around him talked, sang and danced towards the first year of a new decade, George took a swig from his can of beer, swilling it round his mouth before swallowing and looked round the living room. The cream walls covered in bad art, the chocolate coloured carpet, the now empty drinks cabinet in the corner, the furniture pushed against the wall to allow the fifteen or so people to dance to the music coming from two impressively sized speakers. George had been most impressed with the jukebox that took pride of place next to the television in the corner opposite the drinks cabinet. 
 
George didn’t know anyone here, and to be honest, he didn’t even know why he had stayed long after Peter had left with his girlfriend. He was about to drain his can and leave when his thoughts were interrupted by a slightly podgy woman in blue jeans, black knee high boots and a bright pink blouse, unbuttoned so low that the bright white lace on her bra was clearly visible. George tried to look her in the eye as she sat next to him on the already crowded little sofa and spoke to him in a Liverpuddlian accent that made his toes curl.
 
“Do you know Chris?” She made herself comfortable on the sofa, causing the kissing couple on the end of the sofa to pull apart and cast disgruntled looks in their direction.
“Chris? Er, no not really. I came with Peter and his bird. Peter used to work with Chris,” George explained.
“Oh, right,” she said. “I’m Pat, his sister. Nice to meet you.” She offered George her hand. He took it and gently shook it, feeling the softness of her skin and the slightly too chunky jewellery.
“I’m George,” he half-smiled at her.
“Well, George, what are you hoping for in 1980?” She nuzzled up to him.
“I’m hoping for a good year for a change,” George told her matter-of-factly. He didn’t see the point in burdening her with his whole history. Any attempt to tell the story would have taken the discussion into mid-1981.
“Funny that, so am I! You won’t believe what a shitty year I’ve had,” Pat chuckled. George was praying she wasn’t going to elaborate, but she did. For what felt like hours but was actually only ten minutes, Pat told him all about her boyfriend that dumped her by letter, her dabbling in heroin, her motorbike accident and finally, what George never wanted to know, her resulting hysterectomy.
 
George excused himself to go to the bathroom before Pat could tell him any more horrifying stories. On his way, he passed countless couples snogging and indulging in heavy petting. George counted six exposed nipples and three glimpses of female knickers in the journey up the stairs and across the landing. He knocked on the door to check the bathroom was empty and waited a few minutes. He could hear the excitement building downstairs as people realized it was nearly midnight. Just as the bathroom door opened, he heard Pat trudging noisily up the stairs. George ducked in without a second glance and stopped short. The smell caught in his nostrils and almost made his eyes water. He turned and fled the bathroom, slamming the door behind him. He didn’t want to know who had caused that. He edged away from the bathroom and noticed Pat standing at the top of the stairs. She cast him a sultry look, licking her lips and rearranging her cleavage seductively. George took a deep breath and went to walk past her and down the stairs.
 
“Where you going, Georgie boy?” She laughed as George approached.
“Off downstairs. See in the new year,” he told her. She grabbed him by the waist and pulled him in close to her. George could feel her breasts pressing up against him. She started grinding her crotch into his. She leaned in to kiss his neck, and George got a great view down her chest. He noticed a pierced nipple and a little tattoo of a heart. Then he was hit full in the face by the smell of alcohol and tobacco smoke. He smiled politely and pulled away from her.
“Sorry Pat. I don’t think you’re my type, love,” he tried to let her down gently.
“You what?” She cackled. She ripped her blouse open, revealing her white lacy bra and ample cleavage. “This isn’t your type?” George shuffled uncomfortably. Thankfully there was plenty of noise so no one else was too aware of what was going on. He shrugged and turned round to go downstairs.
“Fuck you then, Georgie boy! If you’re not man enough to handle me, it’s your problem!” She bellowed after him.
 
He came into the living room just as the countdown started. The music was off, and the radio was blaring out. The room was filled with shouted counting from five down to one. As Big Ben began its famous chime, balloons filled the air, party poppers exploded covering the revelers with the paper streamers. George happily kissed and shook hands with everyone else. He even joined in when the party emptied into the street. Other parties joined them from surrounding houses, all mingling and wishing well. George was surprised to bump back into Peter and his girlfriend, Marie. They had only gone next door, to Marie’s mothers.
 
“Happy new year, Georgie mate!” Peter bear-hugged him. When released, George gave Marie a celebratory peck on the cheek. Before they could continue the conversation, they were mobbed by more well-wishers. Eventually, Peter was able to tell George that the accommodation problem was solved.
“Marie’s kind mum has said you can sleep on her sofa.” George was relieved as he had been facing the prospect of sleeping rough somewhere in Liverpool.
 
Marie made her excuses and went back into her mum’s house, leaving George and Peter sitting on the front garden wall talking about football, women and the future. So deep in conversation were they, that they didn’t notice the distressed semi-naked woman stagger past crying about being attacked by a pervert. Eventually, Peter and George decided enough was enough and retired to their respective beds. As Peter headed up the stairs, he gave George a pat on the back.
 
“It’s gonna be a good year for you mate. A good year,” he smiled. George smiled back at him and sidled into the front room where Marie’s mum had left some blankets and a pillow on the sofa. As George got undressed, he replayed the evening’s events in his mind, congratulating himself on refusing the emotional mess that was Pat. He folded his clothes and laid them in a pile on the floor. He climbed under the blankets in his Y-fronts and vest and struggled to get comfortable. As George was dozing off, he thought he heard a woman screaming in the street outside. He dismissed it as party noise and fell asleep.
 
George was woken up by the smell of frying bacon. He quickly got himself dressed and headed into the kitchen. Marie’s mum and dad were sat at the small wooden table talking and laughing. Peter was leaning against the sink drinking a coffee, Marie was in charge of the cooking. Marie’s dad stood up and introduced himself and his wife as Graham and Audrey. George shook his offered hand and thanked them both for their hospitality. Marie handed George a mug of coffee, and Audrey motioned him to take the empty chair at the table. George sat down and took a sip of his coffee. As usual, he swilled it around his mouth before swallowing. Marie put three plates of fried breakfast on the table in front of them. Graham looked enviously at the plates, but stood up and excused himself.
 
“He’s not allowed fried food anymore. Not since his heart attack,” Audrey explained. George nodded and gave a sympathetic smile. Then Audrey herself got up.
“So Audrey has agreed to give it up in support, haven’t you love?” Graham put in. Audrey looked longingly at the plate as well. With a sigh, she nodded and followed her husband into the lounge. As Marie and Peter took their place at the table, George heard the television come to life.
“Mum is very supportive of dad. She was in bits when he was ill,” Marie explained through a mouthful of bacon. George nodded. Peter was busy devouring his breakfast. 
 
They had moved into the living room with Marie’s parents when there was a knock on the front door. Graham muttered something about privacy as he got up to answer the door. He left the living room door open, so they all heard the panicked conversation at the door. Graham dealt with visitor and returned to the living room. He was met with four pairs of eyes staring at him with curiosity.
 
“Chris next door. Can’t find his sister, or something. Said we’d keep an eye out.” He muttered as he sat down.
“That poor girl. She’s been through hell this past year,” Audrey said to nobody in particular.
“Is that Pat?” Marie asked her mum.
“Yes, nice girl. Got in with a bad lot, she did. Caused Chris all sorts of worry, she has.”
George looked around the room and saw plenty of sympathy for this Pat. He dared not fill them in on his encounter with her. He had an uncomfortable feeling of guilt in the pit of his stomach. She hadn’t been that bad after all, he told himself. Damaged yes, but all she’d wanted was a bit of intimacy with a stranger. Besides, she had very clean underwear.
 
Peter and Marie had to return to Shropshire that afternoon as Marie was due on duty in the evening. Peter was always boasting about his ‘own little Florence Nightingale’ and the fact that she was everybody’s favourite nurse on the ward. Only in his most unguarded moments did he actually admit that the long hours and anti-social shift patterns caused him grief. Peter and George said their goodbyes and once more thanked Graham and Audrey for their hospitality. They sat in Peter’s rusty Ford Cortina as Marie said a longer, more emotional goodbye to her parents. Marie climbed in the back and Peter revved the engine into life. They drove off down the street, passing a police car parked outside next door. George took a look out of the wing mirror and thought he saw a familiar figure wrapped in a blanket being led into Chris’ house by a stern looking policewoman.
 
The journey back to Shropshire was subdued to say the least. Marie was stretched out on the back seat of the Cortina, dozing under the comfort of a blanket, George was still a bit tired himself, and Peter was fighting to stay awake at the wheel. The trip through the Mersey Tunnel was eerie to say the least, there was hardly another car on the road. Every time he passed through a road tunnel, George was always reminded of the scene in the Godfather, when Michael Corleone is on the way to the restaurant to kill Solazzo and the bent cop. That film had captured his imagination completely. The second part was not as good in his opinion – he had found it confusing at times when the two storylines came and went just as he was getting his head around it. But then George had always felt he should have been Italian. He liked tinned spaghetti and Juventus Football Club, not to mention Sophia Loren.
 
George was broken from his reverie by Peter turning the radio on. The static screeched through George’s head as Peter searched for something he discerned as listenable. On the back seat, Marie stirred from her dozing and stretched. In doing so, she inadvertently nudged the back of George’s seat.
 
“Sorry Georgie!” She said, genuinely apologetic.
“No worries. I didn’t really feel anything,” he lied. She’d caught him right in the middle of his back.
“Bloody radio. It’s all crap!” Peter’s cursing filled the air. “I’m gonna get a stereo with a tape player.”
Marie leant forward into the gap between the two front seats. She smiled and stroked Peter’s neck. He arched his neck so he could trap Marie’s hand between his head and shoulder. They giggled amongst themselves, so George took over the radio tuning, for something to do. He finally found a Beatles tune that was almost static free, and they all settled down to listen when the song ended and some foreign sounding bloke started talking gibberish. Peter’s cursing was joined by George’s.
 
As the Cortina rattled towards its destination, the weather slowly turned from sunny to grey. At one point, the windscreen was dusted with light flakes of snow, before turning to rain just as George got excited. He may have been in his thirties, but he still loved a good snow. It was getting darker and colder by the minute as Peter coaxed the car home – it was a well-loved car and was almost on its last legs. As George tried to tease some heat from the heaters to keep warm, Marie snuggled under the blanket and moaned.
“It’s about time you traded this heap of junk for something more reliable, Pete.”
“There’s nothing wrong with it,” Pete exclaimed defensively. Marie scoffed from beneath the blanket.
“It’s rusty, rickety and a drain on your wallet. It cost you a packet over the last few months.”
“It all adds to the character!” Pete said, feeling hurt.
“Whatever,” Marie chuckled.
 
Peter dropped George off at his house and took Marie off to work. The Cortina coughing smoke alarmingly as it retreated down the street. George chuckled to himself as he shut the door. He took a look around the now sparsely furnished lounge, victim of George’s need for money. He flopped down in the remaining chair and found himself fighting sleep.
 
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And so ends the opening of the story. I would be interested to hear what you think of the story so far, and any suggestions would be given fair hearing too! Is this one worth persevering with readers?