So the most depressing month of the year is over (you know - Christmas is long gone, but you're still counting the cost of it on your wallet and waistline) and we're now into February which is the shortest month (and shortest wait for a pay day!)
What a January we've had!!! Floods causing death and destruction in Australia and Brazil, political mayhem in Tunisia, Yemen and now Egypt, ridiculous amounts of money passing between football clubs for players, and lots more besides.
It makes me wonder what February might hold in store. So, here's my attempt at being Nostradamus:
1) Nick Clegg and the Liberal Democrats to publicy acknowledge the fact that they are dancing with the Devil. Let's be honest, if David Cameron and his guffawing lackeys screw up the country as they probably will, the LibDems will lose all credibility as a '3rd option'. The fact that voting reform has been stuffed in the tatty filing cabinet of political importance says it all...
2) Premier League footballers will have a sudden epiphany and demand wage cuts, insisting that the money be invested in the local community that supports and sustains their lavish existence. Expect to see the Manchester City boys organising anti-crime events in Moss Side, Wayne Rooney running Meals on Wheels (anything to get at those glamorous Grannies eh Wayne?) and Ashley Cole serving soup to the homeless of London...
3) Just as we all think 'The Kings Speech' has sewn up the Oscars, BAFTA's etc, some shitty American film (read The Social Network) swoops from nowhere and causes Colin Firth's polite British smile to turn into a British villain's sneer, and the nation gasps incredulously muttering "we thought it was in the bag..."
4) On the eve of the Brit Awards, organisers cancel the event, with a spokesman stating: "We had a think and to be honest, there's nothing worth celebrating really. It's all a bit shit, to be honest. Sorry folks!" Tinie Tempah cries into his alcopop, and James Corden angrily scrubs it out of his diary. Boo fucking Hoo.
5) The people who classify DVD releases decide to ban all 'celebrity' (in the loosest possible terms these days) fitness DVD's. I mean come on... it's not rocket science is it? Put the cake down and go for a walk!!! Ffs. I'm thinking about going public with my own offering, and may even call it "Put the cake down and go for a walk". I think it has legs...
Anyway, that's all for now folks, hope you enjoyed my predictions and in the meantime, I'll be getting on with my life.
Stay Classy!
Tuesday, 1 February 2011
Monday, 24 January 2011
Happy New Year
Louis Lipps Dan Marino
Walter Payton Jerry Rice
Anyway, back to the reminiscing. Sunday nights were NFL highlights night - 30 minutes of crunching tackles, big game highlights and discussions hosted by Mick Luckhurst to the sound track of 'Two Tribes' by Frankie Goes To Hollywood.
The NFL was big news for a good couple of years, I even got to go to Wembley Stadium to see a live game between the 49ers and the Washington Redskins. Then, for some reason things went quiet - highlights were pushed to late nights on various nights, then coverage was even better hidden to the extent that it was barely on at all. Then it got a minor renaissance on Channel 5 before ITV picked up on it and screened a couple of Superbowls hosted by Gabby Logan with Martin Johnson of all people giving his opinion!!
Then, once the BBC picked up the Superbowl and the NFL decided to bring a regular season game to the newly re-built Wembley Stadium, the whole thing seems to be kicking off again. And I'm bloody glad because it's also becoming more easily accessible.
As for me and my team, the Steelers have a great history. Four Superbowl wins in the 70's was followed by a bleak period in the 80's (and yet I still happily supported them) and then recovery in the 90's building towards their current status as the most successful franchise in Superbowl history - 6 victories to date and now on the verge of a 7th if they can get past the Green Bay Packers. I can even tie in their last Superbowl victory in 2009 with my first meeting with Marisa - I'd gone down to Cornwall for the weekend and met her on the Sunday afternoon, and sat in bed on the Sunday night watching the Steelers beat the Arizona Cardinals 27-23 before travelling back up to Shropshire on the Monday morning.
I've watched quite a few Superbowls in my time, the first one being Superbowl XXI when the New York Giants beat the Denver Broncos, I've missed a few in the meantime when terrestrial TV ignored the game, and then have seen them all since it returned on ITV. Usually I had to settle for highlights shown a few days after the actual game, or more recently getting my dad to video the game and going round after work to watch it (fast forwarding through the breaks in play). This year I've asked James to Sky+ it for me, but God only knows when I'll get to see it!!
GO STEELERS!!!!!!!!
Quiz Answers: Joe Montana & Jerry Rice played for the 49ers, Louis Lipps and Mark Malone played for the Steelers, Walter Payton and William 'The Refrigerator' Perry were Bears players, and Dan Marino and Mark 'Super' Duper were Dolphins players.
 |
| proudly displaying my allegiance |
Well, time for my first post of 2011. And as it just happens to coincide with the start of the Superbowl build up, that is the subject of this inaugural 2011 blog post.
Now American Football isn't for everyone I'll admit - the stop-start nature of the play, the padding, the fact that the British didn't invent it and aren't very good at it - but me, I love it!
My interest in the NFL dates back to the mid-80's when as a 6 or 7 year old, I got caught up in the whole thing along with my brother and cousins. I can't even remember how we caught the NFL bug, but we each had our own teams to follow (with replica shirt to boot): Pittsburgh Steelers for me, Miami Dolphins for brother James, cousin Will went for the San Francisco 49ers and cousin Katie plumped for the Chicago Bears if I remember correctly.
Quick mid-post quiz: Match these players with the four aforementioned teams (I know participation will be zero, but I'm trying!)
Louis Lipps Dan Marino
Walter Payton Jerry Rice
William 'The Refrigerator' Perry Mark Malone
Joe Montana Mark 'Super' DuperAnyway, back to the reminiscing. Sunday nights were NFL highlights night - 30 minutes of crunching tackles, big game highlights and discussions hosted by Mick Luckhurst to the sound track of 'Two Tribes' by Frankie Goes To Hollywood. The NFL was big news for a good couple of years, I even got to go to Wembley Stadium to see a live game between the 49ers and the Washington Redskins. Then, for some reason things went quiet - highlights were pushed to late nights on various nights, then coverage was even better hidden to the extent that it was barely on at all. Then it got a minor renaissance on Channel 5 before ITV picked up on it and screened a couple of Superbowls hosted by Gabby Logan with Martin Johnson of all people giving his opinion!!
Then, once the BBC picked up the Superbowl and the NFL decided to bring a regular season game to the newly re-built Wembley Stadium, the whole thing seems to be kicking off again. And I'm bloody glad because it's also becoming more easily accessible.
As for me and my team, the Steelers have a great history. Four Superbowl wins in the 70's was followed by a bleak period in the 80's (and yet I still happily supported them) and then recovery in the 90's building towards their current status as the most successful franchise in Superbowl history - 6 victories to date and now on the verge of a 7th if they can get past the Green Bay Packers. I can even tie in their last Superbowl victory in 2009 with my first meeting with Marisa - I'd gone down to Cornwall for the weekend and met her on the Sunday afternoon, and sat in bed on the Sunday night watching the Steelers beat the Arizona Cardinals 27-23 before travelling back up to Shropshire on the Monday morning.
I've watched quite a few Superbowls in my time, the first one being Superbowl XXI when the New York Giants beat the Denver Broncos, I've missed a few in the meantime when terrestrial TV ignored the game, and then have seen them all since it returned on ITV. Usually I had to settle for highlights shown a few days after the actual game, or more recently getting my dad to video the game and going round after work to watch it (fast forwarding through the breaks in play). This year I've asked James to Sky+ it for me, but God only knows when I'll get to see it!!
Quiz Answers: Joe Montana & Jerry Rice played for the 49ers, Louis Lipps and Mark Malone played for the Steelers, Walter Payton and William 'The Refrigerator' Perry were Bears players, and Dan Marino and Mark 'Super' Duper were Dolphins players.
Sunday, 12 December 2010
Why I'm not full of Christmas cheer (thanks to Simon Cowell)
In honour of tonights long awaited X-Factor final (at least I don't have to put up with the bastard thing for another nine months), here's why I blame Simon Cowell for ruining Christmas:
The Christmas Number One race used to be exciting. Yes, there were the usual suspects each year - Westlife, Spice Girls, but there was always legitimate competition. And occasionally there was even a proper Christmas song (The Darkness for one, but it was beaten by 'Mad World', a non-Christmas Christmas number one). Now it's like a never ending stream of X-Factor 'winners' - is it a coincidence that the X-Factor ends just in time for a shot at the Christmas chart? It's coming to something when there has to be a concerted effort to get an 'alternative' song to number one. Last year Rage Against The Machine did it with a song over a decade old - because no current artist is brave enough to go head to head with the Simon Cowell PR-machine. However, this year there is a challenge. A modern attempt to recreate John Cage's 4'33 - four minutes and thirty three seconds of people not playing their instruments. Yet it will still be of more interest to me than whatever dirge the X-Factor winner is warbling.
And because people are brainwashed into buying and liking this crap, no one bothers to write a proper Christmas song anymore, well except Coldplay, but let's face it, they're boring and so don't count!
There'll never be another White Christmas, Merry Christmas Everybody, Last Christmas, or even I Wish It Could Be A Wombling Merry Christmas (and cover versions don't count) because it's all driven by PR and hysteria created and nurtured by the flat-headed, high-troused one and his wank-fest procession of supermarket shelf-fillers, circus freaks and soulless dullards only too willing to expose themself to ridicule and an overblown sense of 'celebrity' for a shot at manufactured short term popularity.
As John Lennon sang: "And so this is Christmas, and what have we done?"
Well, John, we've managed to create a monster, and if we're totally honest, it's our own doing. And the really depressing thing is, he probably doesn't give a monkey's if the X-Factor winner misses out on the Christmas number one - all those people that pick up the phone and dial to vote for their favourite imbecile have more than paid for the upkeep of his flat head and his villas and his perma-tan.
But, I'll never let anyone say I'm a miserable stick-in-the-mud, so, to quote Mr Noddy Holder:
It's Chriiiiistmaaaasssssssss!!!!!
The Christmas Number One race used to be exciting. Yes, there were the usual suspects each year - Westlife, Spice Girls, but there was always legitimate competition. And occasionally there was even a proper Christmas song (The Darkness for one, but it was beaten by 'Mad World', a non-Christmas Christmas number one). Now it's like a never ending stream of X-Factor 'winners' - is it a coincidence that the X-Factor ends just in time for a shot at the Christmas chart? It's coming to something when there has to be a concerted effort to get an 'alternative' song to number one. Last year Rage Against The Machine did it with a song over a decade old - because no current artist is brave enough to go head to head with the Simon Cowell PR-machine. However, this year there is a challenge. A modern attempt to recreate John Cage's 4'33 - four minutes and thirty three seconds of people not playing their instruments. Yet it will still be of more interest to me than whatever dirge the X-Factor winner is warbling.
And because people are brainwashed into buying and liking this crap, no one bothers to write a proper Christmas song anymore, well except Coldplay, but let's face it, they're boring and so don't count!
There'll never be another White Christmas, Merry Christmas Everybody, Last Christmas, or even I Wish It Could Be A Wombling Merry Christmas (and cover versions don't count) because it's all driven by PR and hysteria created and nurtured by the flat-headed, high-troused one and his wank-fest procession of supermarket shelf-fillers, circus freaks and soulless dullards only too willing to expose themself to ridicule and an overblown sense of 'celebrity' for a shot at manufactured short term popularity.
As John Lennon sang: "And so this is Christmas, and what have we done?"
Well, John, we've managed to create a monster, and if we're totally honest, it's our own doing. And the really depressing thing is, he probably doesn't give a monkey's if the X-Factor winner misses out on the Christmas number one - all those people that pick up the phone and dial to vote for their favourite imbecile have more than paid for the upkeep of his flat head and his villas and his perma-tan.
But, I'll never let anyone say I'm a miserable stick-in-the-mud, so, to quote Mr Noddy Holder:
It's Chriiiiistmaaaasssssssss!!!!!
Monday, 22 November 2010
Writing Update
Fear not, devoted followers of Dave!
A new adventure is currently being written by my fair hand. (Well typed is more appropriate in these high tech days, and besides, why would I write it by hand, then type it up? It would just make extra work for myself, and that's just stupid.)
It's quite a difficult process working out how Dave can get himself into a situation, and then get himself out of it with his usual applomb, and then injecting my humour in there as well. Unfortunately, sometimes, I don't always pull it off, but no one's perfect.
And you can rest assured I've not been idle since the last Dave saw the light of day. My poor brain has been concocting ideas ten to the dozen, then leaving me to work out how to develop them. Then I'm always on the lookout for competitions to enter, and thinking about how I can improve and tweak existing projects.
I also have an age old dilemma for my ideas - story or script?
A short story or novel may sound good to you, but then you have to think about scene setting, descriptions, dialogue and so on. Things which aren't necessarily in my arsenal. Hence why Dave is an entirely narrative driven thing, something you could tell to a mate down the pub.
As for scripts... Entirely dialogue driven, meaning you have to give the characters something meaningful to say, or funny. I've tried this already, my sitcom 'Blue Jay Way' is now almost 8 years old. It's been rejected by the BBC, read by a provincial literary agent, coaxed and tweaked and re-written by myself and a friend, just to try and get it limping towards some sort of shape and cohesion. Currently there are two fully written episodes, and 2 more in progress, with another 2 to complete the story.
Add to this other projects begun, sketched out, thought of, and I have a full writing plate in front of me.
So, if you're out there, Mr or Mrs Producer, or whoever, I could do with a little help knocking some stuff into shape!!
For now, Dave is on his way!!!!
A new adventure is currently being written by my fair hand. (Well typed is more appropriate in these high tech days, and besides, why would I write it by hand, then type it up? It would just make extra work for myself, and that's just stupid.)
It's quite a difficult process working out how Dave can get himself into a situation, and then get himself out of it with his usual applomb, and then injecting my humour in there as well. Unfortunately, sometimes, I don't always pull it off, but no one's perfect.
And you can rest assured I've not been idle since the last Dave saw the light of day. My poor brain has been concocting ideas ten to the dozen, then leaving me to work out how to develop them. Then I'm always on the lookout for competitions to enter, and thinking about how I can improve and tweak existing projects.
I also have an age old dilemma for my ideas - story or script?
A short story or novel may sound good to you, but then you have to think about scene setting, descriptions, dialogue and so on. Things which aren't necessarily in my arsenal. Hence why Dave is an entirely narrative driven thing, something you could tell to a mate down the pub.
As for scripts... Entirely dialogue driven, meaning you have to give the characters something meaningful to say, or funny. I've tried this already, my sitcom 'Blue Jay Way' is now almost 8 years old. It's been rejected by the BBC, read by a provincial literary agent, coaxed and tweaked and re-written by myself and a friend, just to try and get it limping towards some sort of shape and cohesion. Currently there are two fully written episodes, and 2 more in progress, with another 2 to complete the story.
Add to this other projects begun, sketched out, thought of, and I have a full writing plate in front of me.
So, if you're out there, Mr or Mrs Producer, or whoever, I could do with a little help knocking some stuff into shape!!
For now, Dave is on his way!!!!
Monday, 12 July 2010
World Cup. Done
Not the spectacle of football we were expecting in this final, thanks to the rather unsavoury tactics displayed by the Dutch team. Thankfully the Spanish were able to rise above it and fulfilled Paul the Octopus's prediction.
I'll be honest and say I didn't bother with the 3rd place play-off - a dinner party was a much more appealing alternative after a day of hard labour and a huge Strawberries and Cream frappucino! The fact that the Germans won doesn't mean a great deal in real terms, as for them, they still missed out on the final, and Uruguay were national heroes regardless of the result. Diego Forlan was later voted the best player in the tournament, and young Thomas Mueller won the Golden Boot thanks to 5 goals and his three assists (the assists were used as a tie breaker after about 4 players managed to notch 5 each throughout the tournament).
The final was bound to be a tense affair, with two teams, neither having tasted World success before (hell, the Spanish had never been past the Quarters and the Dutch were two time losers) facing off to be only the eighth different winners of the World Cup. The build up had seen the Dutch state that they had made plans to stop the Spanish passing game, and boy did they try it! Van Bommel, De Jong, Heitinga, the list of offenders goes on. In fact De Jong was extraordinarily fortunate to make it to half time after his chest high assault on Xabi Alonso.
The 2nd half saw much the same, except the Dutch started to come out of their shell, certainly for a while, with Robben having two good opportunities to score, thwarted by Casillas on both occasions, although the second time he was closely attended to by Puyol, which prompted Robben to sprint after English referee Webb to remonstrate. All he got was his name in the book. The ninety minutes ended with no break to the stalemate, and so another 30 minute war of attrition was waged by the tiring Dutch. Fabregas had been introduced and had a great chance, only to be stopped by Stekelenburg's leg. Then, as penalties loomed, Johnny Heitinga tried to swap shirts with Iniesta ten minutes early, and had his game cut short as he saw a second yellow card come his way. Gradually, Spain began to assert their dominance and finally, with a mere 5 minutes or so left, Iniesta lashed the ball into the corner of the net and sent Spain crazy. As the match ran down, there was more drama to come, with Fernando Torres pulling up sharply after coming on late on. There was nothing the Dutch could do, and when the whistle blew, the party started in Johannesburg, Madrid, and well, anywhere there were Spanish people!!!
Captain Iker Casillas managed to wipe the tears away long enough to receive the trophy from Sepp Blatter, raised it to the sky in triumph, passed it on to a team mate and then burst into tears again.
Rather harshly perhaps, the English officials were booed as they went up to receive their medals, but that's just sore losers for you. Even the greatest Dutchman, Johann Cruyff derided the Dutch approach and praised Spain as one of the few teams still playing a brand of 'Total Football'.
As for me, I've got no excuse now. Time to knuckle down and create more adventures for my legendary hero.... Dave!!!
Watch this space.
I'll be honest and say I didn't bother with the 3rd place play-off - a dinner party was a much more appealing alternative after a day of hard labour and a huge Strawberries and Cream frappucino! The fact that the Germans won doesn't mean a great deal in real terms, as for them, they still missed out on the final, and Uruguay were national heroes regardless of the result. Diego Forlan was later voted the best player in the tournament, and young Thomas Mueller won the Golden Boot thanks to 5 goals and his three assists (the assists were used as a tie breaker after about 4 players managed to notch 5 each throughout the tournament).
The final was bound to be a tense affair, with two teams, neither having tasted World success before (hell, the Spanish had never been past the Quarters and the Dutch were two time losers) facing off to be only the eighth different winners of the World Cup. The build up had seen the Dutch state that they had made plans to stop the Spanish passing game, and boy did they try it! Van Bommel, De Jong, Heitinga, the list of offenders goes on. In fact De Jong was extraordinarily fortunate to make it to half time after his chest high assault on Xabi Alonso.
The 2nd half saw much the same, except the Dutch started to come out of their shell, certainly for a while, with Robben having two good opportunities to score, thwarted by Casillas on both occasions, although the second time he was closely attended to by Puyol, which prompted Robben to sprint after English referee Webb to remonstrate. All he got was his name in the book. The ninety minutes ended with no break to the stalemate, and so another 30 minute war of attrition was waged by the tiring Dutch. Fabregas had been introduced and had a great chance, only to be stopped by Stekelenburg's leg. Then, as penalties loomed, Johnny Heitinga tried to swap shirts with Iniesta ten minutes early, and had his game cut short as he saw a second yellow card come his way. Gradually, Spain began to assert their dominance and finally, with a mere 5 minutes or so left, Iniesta lashed the ball into the corner of the net and sent Spain crazy. As the match ran down, there was more drama to come, with Fernando Torres pulling up sharply after coming on late on. There was nothing the Dutch could do, and when the whistle blew, the party started in Johannesburg, Madrid, and well, anywhere there were Spanish people!!!
Captain Iker Casillas managed to wipe the tears away long enough to receive the trophy from Sepp Blatter, raised it to the sky in triumph, passed it on to a team mate and then burst into tears again.
Rather harshly perhaps, the English officials were booed as they went up to receive their medals, but that's just sore losers for you. Even the greatest Dutchman, Johann Cruyff derided the Dutch approach and praised Spain as one of the few teams still playing a brand of 'Total Football'.
As for me, I've got no excuse now. Time to knuckle down and create more adventures for my legendary hero.... Dave!!!
Watch this space.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)